The Times recently published an article called “How to Be Spanish“. The accompanying photo was of a matador posing for the camera.

Well, not a real matador, obviously. More like the kind of hipster you might come across in London Fields. Except in a matador costume.

The author of the article, Chris Haslam, has received a stream of abuse on Twitter over the last week or so from Spanish people who have taken his somewhat stereotypical musings personally.

The abuse is likely to continue given that both El País and La Vanguardia ran stories on the article last week.

It’s pretty obvious that Haslam was trying to be funny and meant no offence. However, stereotyping an entire population is quite a dangerous undertaking. Especially in the Twitter age.

In an article in El País last week called “This is an Englishman who wrote a humoristic piece about the Spanish and nobody is laughing“, an English journalist, Simon Hunter, who works for the newspaper in Madrid, suggested that Haslam was just being English. In other words, a bit sarcastic and constantly looking for the joke in everything. It’s just that his comments didn’t translate over to Spanish very well.

The author of the same article tried to offer a bit more of a measured response than others who have lambasted Haslam. The suggestion was that every nationality has some stereotypes about others, and that it might even be the case that such friendly joking is indicative of a healthy relationship between them.

The problem, perhaps, was that the joke was all one way in the Times article. It might have worked better if Haslam had included some stereotypes about English quirks too, and then compared them.

To be honest, I’m surprised he didn’t. Most self-respecting English people tend to jump at the chance of a little self-deprecation. It’s basically a national pastime.

Maybe he should have called the article “How to be Spanish (or at least a little less English when in Spain).”

Looking at it more from that angle, I thought I’d take a look at one paragraph in particular from the original Times article that has irritated a lot of people in Spain.

“First, forget Anglo-Saxon notions of politeness, discretion and decorum. Being Spanish involves walking into a bar, kissing and hugging complete strangers, shouting “oiga” at the waiter and chucking anything you can’t eat or drink on the floor. Except glasses. That’s too much. But you can drop the please and thank yous. They’re so unnecessary.”

It may be the case that Catalonia (where I’ve lived) is a bit more reserved than other regions, but I think the only time I’ve seen complete strangers hugging and kissing was when Sergi Roberto’s last minute winner against PSG sealed “La Remontada” for Barça last year.

But really, there’s a lot in this paragraph alone that you could rally against. A lot of Spanish people have done. So let’s ignore most of it and focus on what Haslam says about “Anglo-Saxon notions of politeness” not being necessary.

I actually understand why Haslam referenced this. But it’s a bit over-simplistic. It’s true that to English ears, it might sound like the Spanish are a little less polite than we are. But I personally think this is because the English tend to engage in such ridiculous levels of over the top, unnecessary politeness every day.

It’s only the English, after all, who feel it’s necessary to say sorry to the person who has just bumped into them or stood on their foot on the tube.

The Spanish, like every other nationality on earth I imagine, would find that concept rather odd.

I’m English and I find it a bit strange myself. As Kate Fox says in her book “Watching the English”, saying sorry is a kind of weird tic that English people can’t avoid. However silly they know it to be.

And it doesn’t actually mean that we’re sorry at all. A note to non-English readers here – if an English person says sorry on the tube for something that was actually your fault, however minor it was, then you should really reply in kind. Unless you want to suffer some intense passive aggression until you reach your stop.

It’s not just apologising, either. There have been a few times when I’ve caught myself saying “gracias” at least five times in a bakery in Barcelona, before stopping myself delivering any more.

I think they get it, Tom. You’re grateful that they’ve put your loaf of bread through the cutting machine.

Spanish is a more direct language than English. But I think there’s a difference between directness and politeness.

I spent a year going to Spanish classes when I first arrived in Barcelona. I wasn’t just learning the language, but also how it should be used. There were times early on when my teacher would tell me “no seas tan inglés.”  Don’t be so English.

Say what you mean.

I was basically translating from English a lot at the start. I’d use lots of “coulds” and “woulds”, which aren’t as common in Spanish.

Here’s an example. If you’re in the market in Spain and you want six apples, you don’t say “could I have six apples please?” You say something like “give me six apples.” You can then add a please or thanks.

So I’d suggest that it isn’t the case that the Spanish aren’t polite. It’s just that English people tend to have a different idea in their minds of what politeness sounds like.

I actually made a conscious effort in Barcelona to be a bit more direct. A bit less English, in other words.

I think this is essentially what Haslam was trying to point out in the paragraph above. Albeit in a slightly humorous, and perhaps over-simplified way. He was writing for an English audience, and so probably didn’t anticipate that many Spanish people would read the article or that it would be translated into Spanish.

Unfortunately for him, it was. And to Spanish eyes, this paragraph read that the English are incredibly polite, while the Spanish aren’t. At all.

At the end of the day, perhaps what the “How to be Spanish” article tells us is that you’re on much safer ground when you try to poke fun at your own nationality’s stereotypes, rather than others.

The aim of the article was to tell English people how to be Spanish. Instead, it ended up annoying an entire nation.